Up [* * * * *] and Wonder Woman [* * * *]

I'm trying real hard not to write about movies I didn't much like. I saw some good old ones like 'Sound of Music' and 'My Fair Lady' just to get some idea of how good it could get (both of them were the most-watched films of all time).

I've seen a great deal in the last few weeks, but nothing I felt excited about until now. Suddenly I've seen 3 good movies that I must comment on so that others will see them too: The Reader, Up and perhaps Wonderwoman.

Up [* * * * *]

Here's an old balloonman who's lived a safe and comfortable life with a woman he met in his cheddis. They were both children who wanted to save up for a future of exploring south america, but never got past their daily expenses to make it.

He suddenly finds that the urban jungle has grown around his house and they want to get him out - to an old age home. He has no choice but to give in or see if he can fulfill a promise he made to his Ellie to go to Paradise Falls.

So the day they come to cart him off, he fills his chimney with balloons and sets off. On the way he finds a boy scout, a dog and a bird who become friends.

He's transformed from an old man into an adventurer, one who CAN, and does, survive great obstacles for his loved ones. Such an inspiration - the tenacity of the old and the young! It could bring together both with a new respect - a real 'family' movie.

Russian btw. Maybe that's why I liked the story.


Wonder Woman 2009 [* * * *]

This was a wonderful story - told with very american off-handedness, unfortunately, but still the basic story remains interesting.

Wonder Woman is an Amazon, and the story is about how the Amazons vanquished the gods and Ares, the god of war, and kept him prisoner until he used deceit to get out.

Wonderwoman is sent to bring him back. She falls in love with a fighter pilot and that's how she stays in the world to fight evil and bring peace.

Now, maybe it's an inspiration to single women to see the story of the women warriors who live separate, to keep from creating children in 'unholy union' with men. Wonderwoman was created from sand and lightning.

Still, eventually the story is co-opted like the mother religions where taken over by patriarchy reducing the powerful goddesses of 15000 to 'consorts' with minor roles. Wonder woman too eventually falls in love with that puny human male and has to pretend to be weaker than her man in her earthly guise/hidden identity. phooey. But the rest is good.:)

The Reader [* * * * * *]

This is a story about a young boy who falls in love with an older woman (oh yeah!:) and how his life is never the same again. Gosh anything I say about it will be a spoiler - it's such a wonderful movie that it deserves the Oscar it got for best picture.

Kate Winslet is an older woman in prewar germany. She helps a young guy in a matter-of-decency way when he's coming down with scarlet fever. He goes back looking for her when he recovers and is fascinated by her. She has sex with him for his reading skills. It's a lovely romance which really draws you in - a different kind, one that's tender and temperamental with a lot of role-reversal.

One day she walks out on him, when she's given a promotion. The next he sees her is at a Nuremberg trial for being an SS security guard at Auchwitz. It's a nailbiting trial - her honesty vs. the system and history. A very real dilemma that the germans probably went through individually - the guilt, shame and horror of being on the wrong side.

She's sentenced to a life in prison and he tries to go on with his life, failing miserably. Years later, locked in his shell, he begins to reach out to her by reading stories into tapes and sending them to her in prison.

I think I laughed, cried, was shocked, guilty, fascinated and transfixed by their hot, real romance. It's a must-see!

Naked Gun 1, 21/2 and 331/3 [* * * * *]

I've watched the whole series over the last few weeks - I love parody. The rapidfire jokes and the speed of action has probably never been repeated since.

Some of the imitations (George Bush, Thatcher, Gadafi, etc) are amazing. These are must-sees. David Zucker and his brother take political satire to new levels.

The sexual innuendo doesn't look as bad today as it did back in the 80s. I could even call it tame, compared to some of the movies I've seen since. That surprised me, since I didn't think I'd changed so much. I guess the world has changed around me and I have adapted to bawdiness more than I believed possible.

Marley and Me [* * * * * *]

A lovely movie about a guy, his family and his dog. He gets the dog for his wife to stay busy and not plan his life, but the dog's a monster and takes over their lives. Like most dogs I know, he can smash a house in seconds when he's lonely, ruins outings and embarrasses his family.

But like all dogs, he's adorable, and the family grows around him until he's old and dies. If you love animals you'll bawl your eyes out like I did in the end.

"A dog doesn't care if you're rich or poor, smart or dumb. If you give him your heart, he'll give you his. He makes you feel pure and special and brings out the best in you. How many people can you say that about? How many people make you feel good about yourself?"

I couldn't live without mine.:)

JVCD [* * * * * *]

Jean Claude Van Damme's incredibly difficult to write about. For me. He's a hunk, an animal activist with a passion - he goes straight to the top of my list for droolworthy.

But his life's been a mess, as is his career. His personal life is screwy, been divorced 4 times, bitterly. He's got just the kind of male attitude I hate - over the top insensitive and colouring all it touches with a rough monochrome self-centered brush. Bipolar.

Sued several times and criticized as a fake action star (falsely - he's a fighter), he's been unable to shake off his french accent which has affected his career. The media hate him and his fans, like me, try as I might, can't find anything to prove he's wonderful inside. He's handled his life as poorly as any of us.

You'd think he couldn't make a bad movie until you see the junk he's acted in. Not just junk movies, but incredibly juvenile over-acting to go with the b-grade beef-flicks. I felt martyred to even have to watch them.;/

AND THEN ... he makes JVCD!! What a treat. A wonderful view into the world of a 47 yr old man.

The movie is autobiographical with some farce to bring out the elements. You see a larger-than-life star image juxtaposed on an ordinary man. JVCD comes at the end of Van Damme's emotional, financial, career struggles. Things have spiralled out of control so far that they're irretrievable. You see his world from his eyes: his inability to break into Hollywood, his court battles, the media, the uncomprehending fans, his financial ruin; and his helplessness to change anything but his own perception of events.

In the movie he walks into a bank robbery. They force him to pretend that he's taken the bank hostage. He's as helpless as any victim against their guns, kickboxing is just useful entertainment for the real bad guys.

His parents are called by the police to appeal to him. You can see how shattered he is when he realises his parents believed him capable of such a thing, when they should know him better. How many of us have gone through this ... it's as traumatic as any other event in one's life.

He's starkly honest in an emotionally exhausted monologue that almost reduced him, and me, to tears.

The whole movie is superb, showcasing his range as an actor for the first time, in a very cynical and tired tarantino-style of movie-making. The sepia colours are perfectly middle-aged for a 47 yr old view of life. This is how we all look back at our lives. It's a one-way street of chain-reactions, as unstoppable as nuclear fission in a star.

Jean Claude Van Damme

I've been crazy about Van Damme since I was 23 or so. He looks like one of my first serious boyfriends, one that I've always regretted not marrying (though I wasn't in love with him. lol).

I've been watching a lot of his movies and I'll cover them in a Van Damme orgy.:)

Dirty Harry 3 [* *]

I'm almost ashamed I used to dream about Clint Eastwood when I was a kid. He's a chauvinistic monkey without the ... ok, I can't think of insults enough: He just seems uneducated these days. Unevolved. A moron who hasn't got (He was probably always like this, but I didn't notice before he developed wrinkles and my lust subsided.;)

Esp in this movie. He is incoherent and mumbles juvenile psuedo-philosophy like a failed 10th std pass. He fills his movies with naked women who get shot on the chest (why, you sicko??! it's limp, small and sad when you don't have any naked men for us to view who get shot in balls. What a pitiful man you've become.) I think he even has an asian teen ask him how she can go to bed with him, the pathetic old man he is! Thu.

I'd advice everyone to NOT watch any of this dirty clinty series unless they're over 70 like him.