Friday, 29 August 2008

Bachna ae Hasina *

Rating: Low
0/10 for humour
1/10 for entertainment

1. The ethics.

The filmmaker is probably a shallow fellow. You can see straight off that he's blind to the beautiful women hired, he can't see past the skin, and it shows.

And btw, script-writers, lecturing the victims of your abusive 'hero' through him and then making them apologize to him for not welcoming his 'pachtap' isn't kewl. That's how bozos confuse themselves.

Think of the end result of these values, if you thought you were moral - we'd all be frenzied party-freaks, break with less-superficial others and get rewarded; more wild oats, more abandonment, more opportunity. A quick and casual 'sorry' will set the karma in balance again ... took 6 months to undo 12 yrs of damage - one of those took just a couple of days. Speed is the key, and it takes hardly any time at all to apologize and look like a wounded doe if the victim doesn't accept it. Right? Wrong. Won't sell your movie.

It's a typical bollywood story of an insensitive guy who sees women as objects to enhance his image with his friends. He loses for a minisecond and develops insight into how his victims feel after his irresponsible abuse and abandonment. At this point we're thinking, "Ah, this movie has some saving grace ..." but NO!

We're subjected to 1.5 more hours of gruelling lectures by this imbecile as he visits each of his victims and gloats over how they benefitted from his abandonment. "Hey, see ... if I hadn't ground your self-esteem into the mud, would you have got the love of your life? the career among the stars? huh? huh?? HUH??"

First of all, the boy is pudgy and ugly with a weak chin and close-set eyes and ye gods! plump cheeks that quiver! ... sigh his eyes don't quite focus; the girls are all too pretty and intelligent for the wet'n'loose-lipped non-looker but -ugh- they HAVE to be forced on film to fall 'in love' with this ... this creature! Worse, he gets to keep wetting his lips and moving on to the next bigger and less demanding girl.

Dream on, dudes and ... I hope *your* karma is different for your luck as a loser. This is the movieflub of the decade. It'll regress you 200 yrs ... wake up! Your boy isn't getting anywhere with women IRL.:)))))) Ha!

[not to be continued, only compared to heap disgust ...:s]

(Disclaimer: Despite sounding like I hate bollywood movies, let me assure you I have enjoyed 'Singh is Kinng' a week before. Read below.:)

Tuesday, 26 August 2008

Singh is Kinng * * * * *

Rating: High
9/10 for humour
9/10 for entertainment

1. The ethics.

The filmmaker is sensitive to the audience: he begins with a reassurance that there's no cruelty involved - it was graphically generated. It was SUCH a change from cringing all the way to the finishing credits to see if you paid 200 bucks to abuse a chicken for mass entertainment, at which point the director casually throws in a careless 'oh-by-the-by, one of the those humane societies was there for the filming.' for all your breathless wait. Used to make me seethe.

To the concerned filmmaker/producers/director: Thanks, for that thoughtful gesture. It made me relax enough to enjoy every single antic with a clear conscience and a stomach

It's a timeless story of a good guy winning through a combination of good fundamental values, aided by luck, puts it in the genre of Sindbad the Sailor, The Count of Monte Cristo and Les Miserables.

[to be continued]

(Disclaimer: Despite sounding like a crazed fan of bollywood movies, let me assure you I hadn't seen one in 5 yrs before this, and went into the movie reluctantly. :)