Saturday, 25 April 2009

Jean Claude Van Damme

I've been crazy about Van Damme since I was 23 or so. He looks like one of my first serious boyfriends, one that I've always regretted not marrying (though I wasn't in love with him. lol).

I've been watching a lot of his movies and I'll cover them in a Van Damme orgy.:)

Sunday, 19 April 2009

Dirty Harry 3 [* *]

I'm almost ashamed I used to dream about Clint Eastwood when I was a kid. He's a chauvinistic monkey without the ... ok, I can't think of insults enough: He just seems uneducated these days. Unevolved. A moron who hasn't got (He was probably always like this, but I didn't notice before he developed wrinkles and my lust subsided.;)

Esp in this movie. He is incoherent and mumbles juvenile psuedo-philosophy like a failed 10th std pass. He fills his movies with naked women who get shot on the chest (why, you sicko??! it's limp, small and sad when you don't have any naked men for us to view who get shot in balls. What a pitiful man you've become.) I think he even has an asian teen ask him how she can go to bed with him, the pathetic old man he is! Thu.

I'd advice everyone to NOT watch any of this dirty clinty series unless they're over 70 like him.

Thursday, 2 April 2009

Dinosaur, 2000 [* * * * *]

It's a terrific movie, but nothing compared to Jurassic Park.
In fact, it was begun around the same time as JP, but Dinosaur by Walt Disney was finished later. Now, the best aspect of this movie is that, unlike the Speilberg version, it has some lessons in living (Speilberg abhors teaching morality, and favoured the carnal when it comes to animals). Disney on the other hand is far more comfortable with using animals to teach people how to live, love and learn.

The best part of the movie is the teaching of herd behaviour as opposed to domination. How to work together instead of the usual savage 'the strong may live' that is characteristic of dinosaur movies.

The story is lovely: An egg was carried over and nurtured by a band of monkeys, and when the dinosaur has grown, a meteor shower destroys the island on which they live. A few monkeys and Aladar, the dino, escape by swimming away and join a band of dinos headed towards their nesting grounds to escape the starvation of meteor-hit land.

The terrifying Carnotaurs and scavenging birds keep the band moving until the autocratic Kron, head honcho, makes a mistake. He leads the band to a dead-end and refuses to listen to Aladar's reasons. The herd is also trapped by a Carnotaur. What does Aladar do?

Watch the movie and find out!:p

On the whole the colours are brilliant and the story simple. There's a bit of violence, but justified in explaining the world dominated by reptiles.